Preparing for the Future - Questions of the unknown

Assalamualaikum everyone...

Lately, I have been thinking on how I will shape my future until I die... when will I die? How do I make an estimate of this... I need this to chart out how long I need to prepare for myself... here are the data about my family that I know:

• Rasulullah passed away at the age of 63
• My father passed away at the age of 58
• My mother passed away at the age of 70
• All of my siblings are still alive and so far have no chronic disease, at least not that we know of

So, I decided that I will use Rasulullah's age when he passed away since it falls right between my father's and mother's.  If 63 is the age when I will die.  Then, I have exactly 19 years to live in this world.

What do I  need when I am old (perhaps between 50 - 63):

1. Home - should I finish payment for my house or should I just let the insurance take care of it when I die?
2. Car to move around - the last car I own must be bought at the earliest when I am aged 53.  So that the car will not give me much problem during my old age.
3. Savings - how much will I need to live on per month after I have retired from my job? RM6000 per month, if I still haven't my mortgage at that time?
4. Work - until when should I work? 55 years old? 60 years old?  After that what will I do?
5. Health - can I afford to have terminal illness like cancer, diabetes (my mother had it), high-blood pressure? No-way.  I am afraid to eat the medicines, period! What more to eat it on a daily basis non-stop... what a scary thought...
6. Legacy - how much, what should I leave for my children after I am gone? house? Land? I don't have any land... Money?
7. Supporting my children - how can I continue to help my children after they have start working and get married?  Should I help to take care of my grand children.  I needed help when my children were small and suffered when trying to juggle office work while taking care and keeping my children happy.  I hope my children will not have to go through the same struggles that I went through... what kind of support can I give my children in the future?
8. Activities - what do I do on daily basis once I have retired? Learn agama? but I want to learn now, why should I wait until I am old... should I take-up gardening? but I hate gardening... I like beautiful flowers but I don't like waiting for it to bloom... nope gardening is not for me either... what then.. hmm..

Are you thinking of the same thing as I do?  What is in your plan list when you are in your 50s and 60s?  Care to share?  I will tell you what I am planning for my old age in my next writing ok... but these questions are going round and round in my head for quite some time already...  I am thinking about it but not doing any action yet to answer or shape the future for myself...

Let's sleep on it some more.  Tonight, I am leaving a whole lot of questions to all of you and me too... Good night then, sleep tight... Lots of love from me to you... Let's be happy and live to find redha Allah so that we will go to Jannah... May Allah always help us and always be by our side to keep us safe and in this religion, Islam, until death comes...

Wassalamualaikum...

-yellow rose-

A new job - Alhamdulillah

Salam my friends,

This must be a treat huh!  I write 2 articles in one sitting.

I told you sometime back that I had to take VSS (Voluntary Separation Scheme) from my previous employer.  So that actually happened in September 2016.  That was done and dusted.

Before it was done and dusted - I was terrified.  I am a single mom who just committed a big mortgage on a house just before my previous company announce the VSS.  I was in a pit big time! Like any normal kiasu Malay women - I applied for jobs left and right.  Linked-in, Jobstreet, friends and families recommendations, re-wording my resume (at least 3 times), applying on-line at many-many companies website, I even applied part-time lecturing (thinking if I cannot get full-time job, i still can live on part-time jobs)....  Alhamdulillah, finally I managed to secure a job.

So here I am since last October 2016, I have joined another company.  Alhamdulillah, everything is fine now.  But with this new job, my whole life scheduled changes.  The travel time to and from office takes me about an hour or more depending on traffic of the road on any given day.  The work at my new office is more compare to my previous company so I had to stay back at office more often. After many considerations however, I don't feel my situation is all that bad.  My life schedule does change for the better somehow.  I have less time, but that makes me treasure and appreciates the time I have more.  I see my friends less often, but we continue to contact each other via whatsapp and I try to find time to see them.  I have to put in more effort to see my friends, but because I put extra effort, I appreciates my friends more and I miss them even more because we so rarely can see each other.

I still see my children during weekends (I'm a weekend mom since my children decide to stay with their father)... actually just my daughter.  My son has entered into Matrikulasi and is only allowed to come home once a month.  Me and my daughter have great mother-daughter time.  We eat out, we go for swims (ok, she swims - me just sit in water, berendam), watch movies, etc etc.  Life is still good... Alhamdulillah... Thank you Allah.  I love you and Rasulullah... Good night my friends...

Hello 2017

Assalamualaikum 2017 and my fellow friends,

How have you been?  I hope life has been good to you.  How is my life... fairly fine.  Everything is as what I wanted but why it seems that I want more?  We humans are never satisfied, but that is a good thing actually.  That way, we will always challenge ourselves so that we strive to make a better tomorrow than today.

Anyway, that is not what I wanted to tell you.  I just had a conversation with my daughter who is 17 years old, who will be sitting for her SPM this year, in sya Allah.  We laughed so hard at my daughter's story that I thought I must share it with you.

My daughter has 3 tuition teachers.  She takes home-tuition as I believe 1-to-1 tuition is the most effective.  2 of her teachers are male and the latest one is a female.

One of  the male teacher taught her Modern Maths and Add Maths and the other one taught her Physics and Chemistry.  Both of these teachers only brings a pen when they come to teach.  If they bring a bag, there's nothing in the bag.  If they need to use papers or calculator they will just use whatever my daughter has.

Today, she replaced her Physics and Chemistry teacher with a lady teacher.  To my daughter's astonishment, the lady teacher came with a bag full of reference books, and a full load of pencil case. You can find blue, black and red pens,  She has her own calculator too.  To add to her uniqueness, when she draws a graph she use her multi-colored pens to the fullest.  She even draw a graph twice because the first one didn't come out pretty.  My daughter is amazed at how different her tuition teachers are.

Her male and female teachers are too far apart in their behaviours that my daughter and I couldn't help laughing away... Conclusion, men are normally plain and women are normally very colorful and very interesting in nature.  If a man don't get married, I think their life will be extremely boring. However for women, we try to put colors in our lives whenever we can and I think it is so much fun being a woman.  Thank you Allah for making me a woman - colorful clothes with ruffles and layers with many interesting friends.

Good night and may Allah bless us throughout the night with peaceful and restful sleep.  May tomorrow brings happiness and rezeki yang halal dan diberkati Allah... amiiinnn... Wassalamualaikum....

.... yellowrose....

Looking for your soulmate?

Salam My friends,

The entry this time around will sound like an advertisement.  I apologize for this first.

I am helping out to promote this site www.speeddating.com.my.  If you are looking for your other half/soulmate, we know how difficult it is to find one.  We have made mistakes before and to go out and look for a new one that is of a better candidate compare to the one before is like looking for a needle in a haystack.  Speeddating event is supposed to help us, who are ready to go back to the "field" to look for future spouse to find one.  If we just sit at home and watch korean movies like me, and pray to find one, the probability of getting one is really almost zero.  So if you are ready, please try speeddating and you can register at the website www.speeddating.com.my,  The speeddating event organized by this website is only for Muslims though.

"What is speeddating?", you asked?  Speeddating is when a group of single males and females (usually between 10 - 15 singles) come together at an event called speeddating at a pre-arranged site.  At this event, the ladies are seated and the men will sit with each of the ladies for about 5 minutes in a specified rotating (clock-wise or anti-clockwise) manner.  This 5 minutes is the date, or also known as speed dating.  Speeddating is a common event in other parts of the world like America, Britain, China and many many more.  But this event is still new in Malaysia.  I think for busy ladies and guys today, this speeddating is an opportunity to meet other singles at a convenient and comfortable environment.  Because everyone is single at this event, it is less awkward to ask sensitive questions relating to marital status.

So my friends, I do urge you to check out this site www.speeddating.com.my and see if you are ready to join them. Just register as a member first, it is free-of-charge.  Do tell to your families and friends too.

Thank you for your support to the site www.speeddating.com.my.

Have a pleasant evening and a good day for tomorrow and beyond.  Wassalam...

Happy New Year 2016

Assalamualaikum Everyone,

Happy New Year!!! Have you heard or perhaps already felt the impact of the toll hikes everywhere in semenanjung, increase in LRT fares, they say subsidy for electricity and many items will be gone this year too, so our household expenses will increase too... What a way to start a new year huh.

Anyway, so saving has got to be our top priority this year.  Wherever we can save, let's save and curb un-necessary spending but do still enjoy yourself and be happy.  Actually this time around I want to share with you two tips to decrease your electricity bills and avoid your electricity connection to be cut-off because you forgot to pay it.

First tip: Every time you leave home to go to work, no one is at home, right?  So you should turn off all the switches that is connected to your tv, radio, astro, unify or other internet broadband power supply, washing machine, computer, etc.  Please do not switch off important electrical items like your refrigerator or all your food items in your fridge will turn bad.  I did this consistently for the past 1 year plus and it decreases my electricity bill by around RM20 per month.  Before I used to pay around RM60 per month, now I only pay RM40 per month.  You saved around 50 cents per day which when accumulated over a 30 days, totals up to about RM20 savings per month.  So in a year, you saved about RM240. So how do I do this? You know when you are all set and ready to go out that door to head for office right, just put down everything on the floor, then run around the house for 1 min, to switch off all the electrical items that will not be used while you are away.  No worries if you have missed one or two electrical items on, I missed them too.  To err is only human...  Anyway, that was easy breezy kan... please do try this.  I hope you can minimize your electricity bill too

Second tip: Always pay your electricity bill every month.  Even if TNB forgot to send it to you, just pay it anyway.  I know my monthly bill for electricity is about RM40 - RM50 per month so I pay this amount every month whether I got the bill or not.  I pay my bills over maybank2u and save it as my recurring expenses that I need to pay every month.  Usually when I do see the bill, I have paid in excess.  If you do this, TNB will never cut your electricity for the reason of you not settling it timely, in sya Allah.

These two tips don't come from me actually.  Two different friend of mine gave me these tips while we are talking so I just adopt them because I think they are useful.  So I would like to thank both my wise friends for the good advice.

So, let's have a wonderful, fruitful, prosperous, healthy and safe 2016! Be happy always, because all of us deserve it.

Till next time.  Wassalamualaikum....

Creating Sweet and Beautiful Memories

Assalamualaikum my fellow friends,

I will be 43 next January which is less than a month away.  Have you ever thought of death?  Both my parents passed away early - My mother was 70 years old and my father was not even 61 years old when he passed away.  I thought of Rasullullah S.A.W. who also left this world at the age of 63.  If I am to use Rasulullah's S.A.W age as a benchmark, I have about 20 years of living in this world.  20 years is short for me.

This has result in me pursuing happiness with such an extreme determination.  Of course, my ultimate goal in life is Allah's paradise / jannah.  But while I am here in this world, I will relentlessly be in pursuit of my own happiness.  May Allah always be by my side to keep me safe and happy.

So what do I do to be happy?  You can do more or lesser than me, depending on your affordability in terms of finances.  So here's what we (me and my children) normally do.  These are simple things in life that I enjoy and make me happy.  I hope you have a list of activities that you like to do to make you happy too...

1. Go to movies. Sometimes we just go and see what is available and just watch the best option available at that time.  I always remind my children not to fight and give and take.  If previously we have watched my daughter's movie selection then we will try to let my son make the next choices.  Luckily my daughter and I have the same taste in movies so it is so easy for me.  The girls are always the majority... isn't it fun :D

2. Go shopping.  There are always reasons to go shopping.  My daughter and I have hundred of reasons why we need to go shopping.  However, I always  make a point to ask her to give away her exising clothes so that there will be room for the new ones we are buying.  Usually, the clothes we give away is still good.  My son doesn't like to shop as much but he always follow us.  It is so nice to have a son because he is big now (17 years old) and strong, he is our "living" trolley.  My son is really strong, he can carry all the bulky items I bought at Ikea.

3. Eating out.  We definitely do this every week.  This is the favourite of my son.  We try as much as we can to explore new eating places.  We eat everywhere - warung, restaurant or mid-range.  In Malaysia, there are so many types of food we can try - Malay nasi campur, Mamak, Steamboat, Arabic food, Chinese-Muslim food, Korean food, Thai food, Japanese food, Indonesian food, Western food ... there are endless choices in Malaysia.  The vast choices of food in Malaysia are just heavenly.

4. Travelling.  I try to travel with my children a little bit further than KL.  Recently, we went to Langkawi Island.  We had a splendid time of course.  Whenever, we go travelling, I always tell my children before we go for a vacation "We are going to a new place where I don't know the area and you don't as well.  So let's be patient with each other and if we get lost, let's get lost together.  We'll find the way together.".  It is very important that we don't get stressed during vacation because the main purpose of going for a vacation is to enjoy new places and see different things that cannot be found at where you live.

Beautiful beach in Langkawi

5. Celebrating birthdays.  It is utmost important to celebrate birthdays.  My eldest sister tries to make a point that our siblings and our nephews and nieces birthdays should be grouped together by month and celebrate together.  It give us reasons to go to each other's house.  Among my siblings, we take turns to hold the birthday celebrations.  This is important but still, I make a point to celebrate my children's birthday individually within my small family.  I want each of my children to know that they are extremely special and I love them very much. A gift is essential but a cake is not because they can opt to have a nice dinner/lunch instead.  My daughter is extremely conscious of her weight now, so all of us cannot eat too much carbohydrate to follow her diet.

6. Exercising.  My son was a member of his school's rugby team previously so he likes exercising.  He still go jogging in the afternoon.  He will try to drill us and most of the time we will try to go jogging together.  Mind you, we only jog for about 1.5 - 2.0 km.  Nothing stressful.  Enough to get us out from the house for awhile.  My daughter also likes this activity since she is trying to loose weight and I just tag along.  I am the most not-fit.  But they cannot beat me when it comes to zumba :), so I don't feel so bad.

Thank you so much my friends for your continuous support.  I will continue writing.

I have submitted my VSS and will be leaving my current job in 2016.  I am not sure what adventure lies ahead. I'm scared but life must go on.  As long as Allah, is with me, I will be all right.  Allah, please take care of me and keep me safe.

Till next time.  May Allah stays by your side and mine always, all the time, at all times.

Lotsa Luv from me... Yellow Rose...

Thousand Apologies

Assalamualaikum my friends,

I am extremely sorry for being so silent these past 8 months.  I had a shocking news last February.  My company, which is a very stable and a Multi-National company, announced that they will be slowly reducing the staffs in the next five years.  However, looking at the progress, we are speculating that the company will take less than 5 years to remove all of us.

This surprising news gave a very big impact to me as I have a lot of commitments.  I was numbed in the first few months and don't know what to do.  I still don't know what to do actually, but I am slowly thinking.  I am extremely slow in looking for a way out this time around, to my dismay.  We are given 5 years or less and I don't know which year I will be eliminated.  I need to now make some moves to secure myself.  I am not ready yet to leave the "rat race" or the normal employment.  I will keep this within me first but if I am successful in securing another job, I will let you know.

Life goes on as per normal now while I am planning in the background. I pray that Allah will show me the best plans for me and ease my way to make this plan successful.  I seek Allah's help to lead me to the right path, that is the path of those upon whom You have bestowed favor on.

I would like to wish all of my Malaysian friends a Happy Merdeka Day.  May we celebrate many more peaceful merdeka day in years to come.